The concept of spiritual bypassing was first introduced by Buddhist teacher and psychotherapist, John Wellwood, in the 1980s. He says:
“When we are spiritually bypassing, we often use the goal of awakening or liberation to rationalize what I call premature transcendence: trying to rise above the raw and messy side of our humanness before we have fully faced and made peace with it. And then we tend to use absolute truth to disparage or dismiss relative human needs, feelings, psychological problems, relational difficulties, and developmental deficits. I see this as an ‘occupational hazard’ of the spiritual path, in that spirituality does involve a vision of going beyond our current karmic situation.”
What I would add to this from my own experience on my spiritual journey is the layer that points to the pain born of systems of domination. So that’s shown up for me as an attempt to move away from the pain, rage, and heartbreak I feel when I sense into the massive wreckage that said systems have amassed over centuries of operating at every level of American life. And I can feel it when it’s happening in my body: there’s an energy of deep aversion to the rising pain and my heart center begins to freeze. I sense a panic under the freeze and for me, that usually presents as a chaotic, fast, reactive heat that begins to course through my whole being. My head becomes heavy and busy as my rational brain fights to create the argument that I just need to accept and allow. And that’s not a bad thing…acceptance and allowing is a beautiful practice I engage in often.
But here’s the rub: When I try to leapfrog over the pain, I lose contact with the vast, limitless, reliable energy of my heart, and I become driven by my conditioning born of inherited beliefs and behaviors. Then the acceptance and allowance are rendered anemic at best, stripped of any and all heart. The heart energy I’m talking about here ain’t some “good vibes only” shit. It’s the source of all energy that fuels my vow to refuse to turn away from the suffering of all beings. But for me, without the intentional effort to thaw that heart space when I am activated and want to run and look away, I just get lost in a tornadic mass of rage and despair. And believe me, I am of ZERO use to any liberatory cause when I’m moving from that energy.
So that’s a bit about what my spiritual bypassing can look like.
Here’s what I know it NOT to be: It is not spiritual bypassing to seek refuge in my practice as a Zen Buddhist. It is not bypassing when I surrender to the Earth and to my ancestors of all manner and ask to be held, guided, nourished, and forgiven. It is not bypassing when I practice releasing the grip on my instinct to separate myself from ANY other human by disparaging or demeaning them. It is not bypassing to yearn for, pray for, fight for, and believe in human beings’ capacity to realize the beginningless endless web of interconnection with everything and everyone. It is not bypassing to work to remind myself of the countless ways humans HAVE shown up for each other time and again.
We are in a world teeming with cataclysms right now, and the only way I know how to hold on and fortify myself to do the inner and outer work that needs to be done every day is to connect and surrender to the rhythms of life, which a really wise one once said are filled with suffering. But that wise one also said that suffering has a cause, an end, and a cause to bring about its end. My experience has shown me that that cause to bring about its end is a practice rooted in compassion, wisdom, ethics, right action, right speech, and the willingness to allow the pain of the world to break open my heart and pin me to just this moment right here. And I know in my cells that I cannot do that alone. I need other beings to walk with me; I need ancestors to encourage me; I need the mystery to inspire me. There’s no other survivable way for me and there is no turning back so here I am, right here with you as we meet the world and its monumental pain together.
Love,
Kristin